Our Founders Journey
Hello family, friends and dear supporters...
I'm Dominque 33 years old. I've been caring for my mother with Alzheimer's for 7 years and she is now 74 years old. I am the youngest of the 5 children my mother had. In 2016 my mother was diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer's. I remember this stage like it was yesterday, I was in denial. " mommy you're all I got this cant be true," I remember her responding "no baby I'm just a little dehydrated." At the time I was pregnant with my son. I went into labor June 25th 2016, my sons father called my mother and she was able to drive to the hospital but when she got there she wondered the halls aimlessly, she didn't know how to find me or think to ask for help.
This is When I knew all the things she was going through, all the things I researched, all the symptoms were true. I was really slowly starting to lose my best friend. Once I came out of the denial stage I put my cape on and tried everything I could think of to attempt to heal her. From CBD oils. gingko pills, changing our diet, several clinical trails and the list goes on. This went on into her next stages. I'll never forget the day she also accepted something wasn't right within herself. We were attending a family reunion, everyone had left to meet with family it was just her and I in the hotel room. My mother paced back and forward cleaning unnecessary items in the room. After a few minutes I said "momma the maids will do that its ok sit down," she got agitated and continued to clean. moments later she laid down and began to weep. I laid next to her and hugged her and she responded to me somethings not right baby, I said I know mommy. She than said I don't want to be a vegetable, I don't want to be a burden on no one. Still to this day this moment gets me choked up. We both cried the night away.
After that moment I still was on a healing mission. We had than entered the accusations stage. she would blame me for stealing her money and other items. I had to take over paying bills and other duties that she didn't really get to prepare me for as a young adult. I recall the defeated stage I came to, I had just ran out of fuel I felt hopeless defeated by this horrible disease. Out of panic mode I wrote a grant with HFC in 2018. I was contacted and told I won a grant I didn't even remember writing. God lead me to them or them to me. My mother was now at the wondering stage and needed to be watched closely 24 hours a day. I remember being mentally and physically drained.
Home Instead is the in home care HFC, founded to have a caretaker come relieve me. I won enough hours to have a care taker 3 times a week for 5 hours for six months. Our first care taker was Linda. I knew God had his hands in this because Linda was a true angle she cooked, cleaned, and forced to me go out the house to regroup. Some days when I would sleep late she would take mom on long walks, movie or ice cream dates and some time she would even include my son. My mother fell in love with her, every time me and my mom was in the car any car that looked similar to Linda's car she would point at and say Linda. I was very sad to see her go, however I won the extended grant two more times after that. I was able to keep Linda for awhile but when Covid hit she had to stop working due to health reasons.
Shortly after my mother caught Covid which made her physically progress. She started to lose control of her movement and bladder. She started to talk and respond less. This lead her up to her final stages which we are still in the fight now. I have learned so much along the way. I have connected with so many resources in our community, I now want to be a light to someone's darkness a go to organization that can guide others in any directed at any stage of this battle, I want to be the person I wish I had in those confused challenging times.